Reflections and Responses

Christy Nockels' song "Wonderful" describes how I am feeling about Jesus after a recent series of events in my life. We should always feel this way about Jesus,  but if we are honest, I think many of us would say that there are times when we don't feel this way about Him. There are times when we are confused, frustrated or stubbornly wanting to reject the way He is orchestrating our circumstances. I was feeling that way until He completely clarified something for me. Now that this distracting situation is removed and I'm not confused, I feel like I can fully see again... and you know what I am seeing? I'm seeing him moving and I'm seeing His purposes and intentions in the circumstances I had been finding so disturbing. How crazy that He loves us and waits patiently with open arms for us to "get it" while our arms are crossed in frustration? Here are the lyrics... Jesus, You are so wonderful.  So wonderful in all Your ways.  The highes...

John and I had a conversation one night this week about the future. What do we want? Where do we want to land - with our careers, our family, our finances? How and where do we want to share Jesus with people? What is He asking us to step into? The thing is... we really don't know. We know that we both love what we do now. But we really aren't seeing beyond right now. This is good on one hand, because it forces us to have childlike faith, trusting God one day at a time without being able to see beyond that. Dependance on Him is a good thing, no questions asked. However, it's frustrating on the other hand because it makes it hard to set goals and know what direction to lean if we don't know where we are headed. Some days I really want to be a suburban super mom who is really beautiful and manages to cart my kids around, rock an intense fitness class, and then have a gourmet dinner waiting on my husband as he walks in the door every day, no sweat. But then I sit next...

This has been a fast, intense week, but in some really good ways! John's away for class #2 of his Master of Public Administration degree, so I've been "bacheloretting" it up since Sunday! I've had dates with girlfriends almost every night he's been gone. I've headed from busy work days straight to restaurants to meet with gal pals. I've loved my time with dear friends, but my body hasn't loved me for not even getting HOME until after my bedtime has already passed (oops). Breaking out of your routine sometimes is healthy though, especially when it results in quality time with people you love and who minister to you and you to them. I've had several great, challenging conversations with really good friends of mine this week. I've left each conversation praying that God will help me process and glean from each conversation whatever He wants me to glean. I feel like He is helping me see selfish places in my heart where I have betrayed Hi...

We give in to our flesh too easily. When I have a person holding me accountable, I sin less. When it's "just" God who will know about my actions, I sin. How crazy and warped is that? That proves that we I am overly concerned about my reputation. How easily we allow ourselves to ignore the truth that God is with us always and sees every time that we decide to choose sin over obedience. It makes me ill to think about it. Here's the even crazier part: He loves us anyway. He sees us consciously choose something OVER intimacy with Him and yet He forgives us. "As far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our transgressions from us." - Psalm 103:12 Amazing love. Really, really hard to understand.

1 LORD, hear my prayer, listen to my cry for mercy; in your faithfulness and righteousness come to my relief. 2 Do not bring your servant into judgment, for no one living is righteous before you. 3 The enemy pursues me, he crushes me to the ground; he makes me dwell in the darkness like those long dead. 4 So my spirit grows faint within me; my heart within me is dismayed. 5 I remember the days of long ago; I meditate on all your works and consider what your hands have done. 6 I spread out my hands to you; I thirst for you like a parched land.[a] 7 Answer me quickly, LORD; my spirit fails. Do not hide your face from me or I will be like those who go down to the pit. 8 Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I entrust my life. 9 Rescue me from my enemies, LORD, for I hide myself in you. 10 Teach me to do your will, for you are my God; may your good Spirit ...

Some days you just miss things. Today I am missing: My sister My mission trips to El Salvador springtime - warm weather, flowers, greenery, anticipation of summer I am very grateful for the present moment and confident that God has things for me TODAY. But my heart and mind have wandered to those three things today. Seeking my DAILY bread and charging ahead!

I have been hit with a fear in the last year and a half that the enemy is really trying to use to cripple me. I have a chance to face this fear in the next month or so. I'm looking forward to it on one hand because I want to get over it. I've done some reading about phobias, and the best way to get over them, I mean REALLY get over them, is to face them, but create a different outcome (experience peace and secure feelings, not fear/anxiety). By putting yourself in the situation again but creating a positive experience, you disassociate the situation with anxiety and instead associate it with calm/peace/tranquility. This makes logical sense, but there are steps to be taken to mentally prepare yourself for this. Not many people can just walk into a situation that has provoked fear in the past and snap their fingers to create a positive experience. I've been taking these steps, but will you join me in praying that God will help me conquer this fear and make my next experience ...

John says often that he feels like we should still be in high school. It simply does not seem possible that we can be roughly one quarter of a century old, have "real jobs," be married, and own a house. We sometimes feel like time hasn't passed and we are still the teenagers who loved riding in his truck listening to country music, sharing coconut cream pie milkshakes from Sonic, and going out to lunch after church. Regardless, I spent some time today with a friend from college who I don't see often, and suddenly I realized that time HAS passed. Reconnecting with a person or a place from the past can have that effect on you - helping you see how you have changed and things are different than they once were. I suddenly felt very different, and the person across the table from me was also very different from the girl I'd made many memories with at Berry. Nothing was bad between us - just unfamiliar. Spending time with her made it hit home that time has gone by and ...

"Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things." - Philippians 4:8 Many of us have read this verse hundreds of times - normally in the context of encouragement to think positively. However, I heard someone give commentary on this verse that really spoke to me and has revolutionized the way I think (or... the way I aim to think!). Focus on the first adjective in the verse: whatever is true . You may not realize it, but thinking only about "true" things only is actually quite a challenge. I find that I spend a lot of mental energy dwelling on things that I wish were true, things that were once true (the past), things that I hope to be true soon (the future)... but these thoughts are not in alignment with what the writer asks us to do: think exclusively about what's true. I find that I spend mental...

One of the tremendous blessings about never moving too far from home is the proximity to so many groups of friends & the ability to see one another over the years. I grew up in one town in the ATL suburbs, went to school 1.5 hours away, and then moved back to the same metro area. Living in the same 1.5-hour radius for my entire life has made it feasible to stay connected with friends from as far back as preschool (yes, preschool!) and from every single school, church, job, or living situation I've ever been a part of. My husband is the exact same way - having grown up in one place and never lived further than an hour away, he's still friends with people from "way back." Both of our families (immediate and extended) live nearby also, making it geographically convenient to be in relationship with all of these individuals now as adults. While the ability for us both to see & stay connected with these loved ones is a true gift from God, it can also make things som...