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Homesick

Today, I am unsettled and kind of sad. The word that best describes how I am feeling is homesick. What am I homesick for? I live with my husband just 45 minutes from my family & the town I grew up in, so it can't be the familiarity or "home" that I grew up in...I think I'm homesick for a couple of other things.

I'm homesick for the ease of childhood. I have a birthday on Monday, and it honestly amazes me that I'm an adult woman, working full-time, married, and probably about to own a house. Each of those things is awesome - a tremendous blessing, but each also comes with responsibility. Decisions to be made. Relationships to maintain. Resources to allocate. I know that the responsibilities of life on Earth will only increase as I get older, but thankfully, so will my wisdom and maturity.

I think I'm also homesick for Heaven. That may sound odd, but what I mean is, I'm homesick for the place where words don't matter, bodies don't break, people don't hurt, and pain is nonexistent. I'm homesick for a place where I can constantly be with Jesus, instead of the Earth where I'm continually fighting to maintain my focus on Him and only allowing Him to capture my attention at (far too brief) intervals. Basically, I'm homesick for a place void of the difficulties that inevitably accompany life on Earth.

But I'm not in Heaven; I'm here. So, I need to keep fighting to keep my focus on Jesus and ask Him to help me put all my hope in Him - not the blessings He has given me. Thankfully, we have the Holy Spirit to guide us during life on this earth, and for that I am grateful. But I'm also extremely grateful for the still, small voice inside of me that reminds me that I'm not home yet.

Comments

  1. Misty PaigeMarch 3, 2011 at 1:49 PM

    thanks for sharing. I feel the same way many days - homesick for heaven.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AmyMarch 3, 2011 at 3:35 PM

    I love you Leigh! Thank you God that you are the only thing that is perfection...amen. <3

    ReplyDelete
  3. Leigh HarperMarch 3, 2011 at 4:26 PM

    Glad I'm not alone :-) Thanks for sharing your comments.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AndrewMarch 3, 2011 at 10:15 PM

    What a powerfully poignant post -- thank you for sharing. You've given words to how I feel many times: homesick.

    ReplyDelete

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